it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize