The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
