I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
