I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
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