i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.