am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I'm both gender and math confused
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
