Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!