ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
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Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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