Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize