We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
