If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
