i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
