He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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