glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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