the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize