Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I want to be your penis for a week.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going