Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
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He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
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Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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