I murdered the dance floor call the cops
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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