Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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