he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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