Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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