Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize