on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
