i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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