4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
