If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize
