No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
