Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
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Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
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I just want to make out with him forever
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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