ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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