I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
