I think scott just propositioned me for sex
everyone is single if you try hard enough
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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