Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
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