I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
