he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize