Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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