That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Randomize
