He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
