is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
