I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize