; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize