Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left an ass print on the piano.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize