To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
God, you're like boner-b-gone
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Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
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I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.