508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
