well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
