lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize