His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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