So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize