Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
