Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
