Your face is a jimmy john
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
