Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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