Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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